I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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