so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I could have mohawked her pubes.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
