Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize