Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
