we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
