On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
