i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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