If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
