Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize
