in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
