I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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