She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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