I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
