So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize