I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I party with great urgency now.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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