I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
