There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
