well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
