What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
