i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
