I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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