It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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