honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Help me help you realize you are a moron
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
