is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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