These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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