My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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