i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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