they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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