I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
