I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize