do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize