watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
