people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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