just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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