so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
