I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
