how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
