How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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