:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize
