PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
