Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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