quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
