He is such a slut. More and more my type.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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