I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
