they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize