hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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