Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
