Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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