you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Randomize
