Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Is it because I queefed?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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