DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize