jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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